I’m in awe of the amazing, almost magical talents of Hollywood filmmakers. The screenwriting, directing, acting, photography, sound, and editing on most motion pictures is nothing short of brilliant. Since I’d be hard-pressed to put together a You-Tube video, I hesitate to offer Hollywood even the most constructive of criticism. Nevertheless, after viewing some sincere but unintentionally stereotypical films set on a modern-day American ranch, I feel compelled to make the following points:
· Mustangs don’t actually run wild through every canyon in the West.
· For the most part, ranch women don’t wear a lot of button-down chambray blouses and bar-fly cowboy hats. Most of us don’t have hours to spend on our hair and make-up before we go do our chores.
· As a rule, ranchers don’t wear denim jackets. They do wear sturdy gloves when fixing a barbed-wire fence.
· Horses rarely, if ever, rear, paw the air, and whinny at the same time.
· Steers don’t have udders; cows do. A Longhorn steer is not a bull just because he has horns.
· No respectable horseman yanks on the reins, utters the words Giddy up, or gallops his horse back to the barn—unless it’s on fire.
· Sadly, barn dances are not the norm, except for the occasional dude outfit.
· Hay is not fed by the handful, lest livestock quickly starve to death.
· All rich neighbors are not bad guys who are scheming to drive less-privileged ranchers off their land.
· It’s quite possible, even preferable, to move cattle without whooping, hollering, and galloping one’s horse madly about. Also, faster is hardly ever better.
· Regrettably, few ranchers are lucky enough to have a sagacious Native American who works for them and dispenses timely, perceptive advice on relationships and parenting.
Fact is often less enchanting than fiction, I suppose, so I doubt that Hollywood will be consulting me for advice!
“The fundamental fact of existence is that this trust in God, this faith, is the firm foundation under everything that makes life worth living.” –HEBREWS 11:1